The intricacies of marriage



Image:© belahoche/ Fotolia

Love is really the sparkle which makes the wish for a marriage reality, but it is not the reason a man and a woman to stay together year after year and overcome together the obstacles and fights, to have children.

Regardless of whether you have been together for a year or your entire life, there are some “secrets” which really make the marriage possible to continue.
A picture of you on display
No, the one from the wedding does not count. It can be one of the vacation or dances at someone else’s wedding. It is better to not be older than 5 years – this way it will show your wish to be together has not vanished.
A joke that only you two understand
Without any sense of humor your relations can hardly go on. If you are together for years, it is not a problem to find a joke which true meaning know only the two of you. This can be even one of your little secrets.
Discuss but do not fight
You cannot always be on the same opinion, this does not mean you have to participate in fights which lead to nowhere except get all of you nervous. If you feel your disharmony turns into a fight, stop and postpone the talk, try again the next day – if it does not work again, postpone once again. Someday this talk will end no matter how.
Remind yourselves that you love each other
Psychologists have proven that everybody loves to hear and say “I love you!”. The moments before falling asleep or waking up are very appropriate. Words can be replaced by gestures. If with time you find “your own” specific way to show that love is still there, this will add color to your relationship.
Think about the ultimatum 
Even a marriage going on for decades periodically needs a check-up. If for example your partner makes you choose between something in your personal life and marriage, you will have to choose regardless whether you like it or not. At the end, you can always choose to stay together or separate.
Do sports and walk together
The busy person needs more rest. Try to find a sports activity which you both like or just walk in the park together. The pleasant time spent with someone is not only having nice memories but “food” for your relationship.
Ask for help sometimes
Regardless of how well you know each other, you can never say you know what your partner want. The everyday life is sometimes hard and sets obstacles. If you feel you cannot make it on your own, ask your partner for help. If you don’t receive it at once this has nothing to do with marriage, but if you are denied every time, is there a common future…
Be together but separate at the same time

Every person has their own interests and hobbies. It is true that the common interests and activities can heal the relationship but the excessive tries to be together can be negative. A person needs his own time. Respect this wish in your partner. This way you will appreciate more the hours spent together.
Accept that you are different

When meeting someone for the first time, we always try to understand what he/she likes and what not. This should not change since marriage is a fact. If your partner for example likes to travel to some places with historical value or go to museums, you try as well – it may be that you find new experiences in this.
Overcome the obstacles together
And such there are or will occur in every marriage. Go through them together and this will enliven your wish to stay together. You will become even closer the more times you succeed over obstacles.




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